women in work

In elementary school it was pretty much understood that girls were smarter than boys. Boys were stronger, though, and better at sports. There were exceptions, sure, the boy who could recite the times table back and forth or the tomboy that owned the dodge ball court, but for the most part these were widely accepted facts. Of course, by middle school there was grey area, and in high school the lines had disappeared.

Growing up in a conservative Westchester suburb, the average family was governed by an investment banker father and home-making mother. I'm certain a few moms had jobs, but thinking back I can't remember any of my friends with working mothers or even a female neighbor with a full time job. These dynamics shifted as I got older, yet even still I'm not sure if the change was caused by ever-shifting societal/gender roles or just my family's move to Los Angeles. My own mom didn't pursue a career until later in life, post-divorce and after two of her three kids had left for college.

In school, we're almost aggressively taught that women are as capable as men, but we've also had enough women's history months to know that equal rights have never been a breeze. I'm well aware of the glass ceiling and gross injustices/sexism in even the US workplace; logically, none of that should surprise me.

But, here I am, in "the working world" and, now that it's right in front of my face, it's jarring. I live and work in LA. It doesn't get much more liberal than that. And, while I'm in publishing, we're more tied to the entertainment industry than anything. You would think that if there's a place that inequality in the work place is least pronounced, it'd be here.

Still, my company, which is around 30 people, employs nearly all men. The CEO is a man. The CFO. The VP Sales. The Executive VP. All the creative guys. Everyone with any authority is a man.

My boss is very well connected in entertainment. As his assistant, I hear all the calls he makes and have come to recognize the names of the various high powered lawyers, executives, etcs with which he interacts. They're all men. Save maybe one or two. The only woman that comes immediately to mind has a very high powered husband.

As a young woman, you're always somewhat aware that it's "a man's world." But I assumed as a well-educated, capable, and motivated person, that it wouldn't actually matter. They say that, sure, but, I can do anything, right? Well, I've become abruptly aware that "they" were right. I don't think I'm meek, but I'm not all that forceful or combative either. How do you balance being a respectful, thoughtful girl in an abrasive, innately chauvinistic environment? I'm still working on figuring that out.